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Category Archives: nonsense verse

New writing contest coming up, an interview and more….

Watch this site –  http://writersandauthors.blogspot.com/2010/06/w-writing-contest-coming-soon.html

While you are there, have a peek at  the interview – http://writersandauthors.blogspot.com/search?q=Poulter  Check out the links too, including one to a FREE  press release posting site!

The interview features info on my new book, coming out with PicPocket Books on iphone in August. It was created in collaboration with Monica Rondino, Andrea Pucci and my youngest daughter, Estelle Poulter. Parents and others – do you have teething babies  or toddlers who bite and have older siblings who object to being bitten?  You might just find some help to be had reading this humorous story with a rhyming element!

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Book Safari – the Journey to Woodlands! Ipswich Festival of Children’s Literature

Peter Taylor, the multi-talented SCWBI Coordinator , Queensland chapter, and the Book Safari Coordinator, the inimitable Jenny Stubbs roped me in to help with the Book Safari tents at Woodlands. This was a first for me and proved to be an excellent networking and promotional activity. Opportunity abounded to talk to lots of teachers, students and other writers, illustrators, publishers and editors.  In other words it was reading, hearing, viewing and doing STORIES, pretty much non stop!

Links: Another great blog on the Ipswich Festival of Children’s Literature –

http://misshelenwrites.wordpress.com/2009/09/09/more-on-ipswich-festival-of-childrens-literature/#comment-569

Here is a pictorial overview from the days I was there – 2nd, 3rd and 5th of September.  PHOTOGRAPHS: 1-3 Woodlands;

Woodlands, Ipswich from the approach road

Woodlands, Ipswich from the approach road

The heritage listed Homestead with the Book Safari banner at the entrance

The heritage listed Homestead with the Book Safari banner at the entrance

Why it is called Woodlands.

Why it is called Woodlands.

4-6 Editors, Presenters, Writers and more…

Kristina Schulz, UQP, Leonie Tyle, Random House, Dr. Robyn Sheahan-Bright

Kristina Schulz, UQP, Leonie Tyle, Random House, Dr. Robyn Sheahan-Bright

Julie Nickerson, Cheryl Gwyther, Dee White

Julie Nickerson, Cheryl Gwyther, Dee White

justin D'Ath's very unique book launch

Justin D'Ath's very unique book launch

7-9 Illustrators and workshops…

Behaving like Wild Things at the mask making workshop with Lee Fullarton

Behaving like Wild Things at the mask making workshop with Lee Fullarton

Lucia Masciullo shows us her new books x 2

Lucia Masciullo shows us her new books x 2

Lachlan Creagh inspires us with his own brand of wild things

Lachlan Creagh inspires us with his own brand of wild things

10-13 The nomads at their tents…

Peter Taylor,writer, illustrator, calligrapher and SCWBI coordinator

Peter Taylor,writer, illustrator, calligrapher and SCWBI coordinator

Author/illustrators, Helen Ross of Miss Helen Books and Lynelle Z. Westlake

Author/illustrators, Helen Ross of Miss Helen Books and Lynelle Z. Westlake

Lynelle Z. Westlake using every spare minute to create!

Lynelle Z. Westlake using every spare minute to create!

J.R.Poulter + books, Peter Taylor not losing a moment in the background

J.R.Poulter + books, Peter Taylor not losing a moment in the background

Jenny Stubbs and Book Safari Coordinators in handpainted, South African t-shirts designed for the festival

Jenny Stubbs and Book Safari Coordinators in hand-painted, South African t-shirts designed for the festival

MS Readathon Tent

MS Readathon Tent

14 & 15 Jenny Stubbs and the Coordinating Team outside the Jacaranda Room; MS Readathon Tent

16 – 19 The people who keep the writers and illustrators viable – the amazing folk of the BOOK GARDEN!

Douglas Fussell, author and early childhood adviser

Douglas Fussell, author and early childhood adviser

John Moffatt, Book Garden troubleshooter

John Moffatt, Book Garden troubleshooter

Deb Zavelsky, owner and children's literature supporter

Deb Zavelsky, owner and children's literature supporter

The Book Garden logo

The Book Garden logo

Part II. Mattias Adolfsson the Illustrative Storyteller

Like all good illustrators, Matias is a storyteller with paint and ink. The joy of working with folk like Mattias, Angel Dominguez, Bernhard Oberdieck, Nick Harris, Sarah Davis and others, is that they can load layers of meaning into a single picture adding dimension to the text. They are also able to add illustrative subplots of their own that augment the main plot and add visual interest. The other joy, and I speak here as a writer, is that their very doodlated sketches and ‘just for me/ for fun’ works  speak, story positively oozing out the edges. I have episodes of  total right brain escapism let loose with Mattias’ tantalising takes on everything and anything and more. Many of the Wacky Wordages on my blog or available for teachers and students and others  via www.sharing-books.com, are the result of such episodes of  creative indulgence.

Characters

Beatnik Dragon [alias Mattias?]

Beatnik Dragon -alias Mattias?

Gnu with G[n]un

Gnu with un Gnun

Monster 4

Monster 4

Person carriage with mini-elephant

Person carriage with mini-elephant

and more characters…

Piggles

Piggles

Sky Dragon

Sky Dragon

The importance of flat sock ironing

The importance of flat sock ironing

Bertie in bath - character in "Improbable Adventures..." with J.R.Poulter

Bertie in bath - character in "Improbable Adventures..." with J.R.Poulter

Jennifer: The comic book element is present in many of your blog posts, you mentioned a course in comic writing/creation. What brought on that deviation? What are you ambitions in venturing into that genre?

Mattias:

I’m not a big comic reader (I used to be though) but I’d like to do some kind of comics/book soon. My priority has to be making a living though, so it’s hard finding time making something like books and comics on my own time without the monetary backing.

Jennifer: The sense of story in your works is strong. Do you have plans for your own children’s picturebook? What about a darkly humorous graphic novel? [You keep tantalizing us with hints of projects underway.]

Mattias: I have a problem with too many ideas at the moment, I need to focus on print and leaving the web perhaps, I spend far too much time doing internet things. Maybe a yearlong web sabbatical would do the trick.

Characters in current book project, “Improbable Adventures…” :

Elery takes off

Henry takes off

Elery

Elery

Henry & ice-cream truck

Henry & ice-cream truck

Jennifer: I find your work inspiring in a dangerously right brain way!

Do you find the drawings evolve themselves from the end of your pen and do their own thing or do you try to control them?

Mattias: I often say that the drawing kind of evolves rather than being planned, but when I look at the drawings I do, or rather, I can see certain themes, I guess that my right brain does know what it wants to draw…

Some of Mattias’ ‘right brain inspired’ series :

Rocket series: Goth Spear Tower Rocket

Rocket series: Goth Spear Tower Rocket

Robot sea creature series: Magnetic Fish 3

Robot sea creature series: Magnetic Fish 3

Domestic Monster series: The Manual Clothesline

Domestic Monster series: The Manual Clothesline

The House Flower Series - House Flower 1

The House Flower Series - House Flower 1

Jennifer: Do you get many approaches from the corporate world? I mean if I were Mojo, I’d want you to design my logo! What are some of the more oddball commissions you have had?

Which commissions do you enjoy the most?

Mattias: I get some approaches but not enough and far too few are oddball, I’d love to do textiles or pottery (not sure about the right name for this). The strangest was doing fashion Illustrations for an English magazine (I’m totally uninterested in fashion). The best commissions I’ve done are when I get a free hand (surprise)!

A variety of  output….

New Ideas in Vacuum cleaners

New Ideas in Vacuum cleaners

This is the back of the book "Till mitt barnbarn" Mattias had been working on, it's all the objects from the first page neatly packed.

This is the back of the book "Till mitt barnbarn" Mattias had been working on, it's all the objects from the first page neatly packed.

Jennifer: There is a great ‘new’ interview with Mattias on Design Taxi for the curious. So, Mattias, having barraged you with questions, which one that you DESPERATLEY wanted me to ask, have I left out? Now is your turn!

Mattias: Do you sometimes fret over if you are too much of an illustrators’ Illustrator and may be not have a very commercial style?  The thought has occurred to me lately. I’m trying to get commission work and maybe an art sales rep, but it’s hard and very time consuming.

Jennifer notes: The mechanics of earning a living with art and literature require,  especially in in the early stages of ‘breaking in’,  other work which  seems constantly to threaten to rob that precious and closely guarded creative element, ‘time’, and yet the  art/literature is the raison d’être and the other, the ‘intrusive’ work, merely essential if the writer/artist is  to do something as mundane as eat.

More variations of Mattias’ output:

Parade: on a roll - Some additional drawing to the book Mattias is doing (Bonnier & Carlsen) with his sister as a designer.

Parade: on a roll - Some additional drawing to the book Mattias is doing (Bonnier & Carlsen) with his sister as a designer.

Cooking utensils series - done whilst commuting on the train

Cooking utensils series - done whilst commuting on the train

57 birds and one owl

57 birds and one owl

Early adopters adopting their adaptations

Early adopters adopting their adaptations

Lonely Chinese Tree

Lonely Chinese Tree

A rose is a rose is a rose

A rose is a rose is a rose

And, just to show Mattias does not just do humorous work, but very delicate and detailed pieces as well, I have included the flowers at the end of the interview.

Those of you hungry for more – go to :  http://www.mattiasadolfsson.se/  http://mattiasa.blogspot.com/

Wacky Wordage No 15 – Soupilifications by J.R.Poulter, illus by Mattias Adolfsson

House Tree Lower by Mattias Adolfsson

House Tree Lower by Mattias Adolfsson

Soupilifications by J.R.Poulter

“Soup”, said the little bird up in the tree,

“It’s SOUP they want to make of me!”

O> O> O> O>

“Disgusting!” the parrot replied, but he lied.

He’d helped brew the stew of the others who’d died.

O> O> O> O>

The little bird looked at his trembly wee feet

And went , Tweeeeeeeeeeeeeet….”

O> O> O> O>

“Alas, ‘tis sad,” the parrot sighed,

“Come sit on the branch here, by my side.”

And the parrot preened, stretching his wings out wide.

O> O> O> O>

“You have big wings, I could curl up and hide…”

The wee birdy twittered. The parrot obliged.

That was the last that was heard of wee bird.

O> O> O> O>

So here’s a tip for you or whoever,

Birds of a feather should NOT stick together

If one of them’s on the menu ever!

Wacky Wordage No. 13 – J.R.Poulter and John Blackford – Little People Shouldn’t Play…

The Ancient Hero and the Robot by John Blackford

The Ancient Hero and the Robot by John Blackford

Little People shouldn’t play… by J.R.Poulter 08

Little people shouldn’t play

With things that stab and prick, okay!

I say this to you little man

For your protection and I am

Going to take your sword away!

No off you go, good boy, and play!

Wacky Wordage No. 12 – John Blackford and J.R.Poulter – Expelling Spell

Wizard by John Blackford

Wizard by John Blackford

Expelling spell by J.R.Poulter

Now which one was it?

I must get it right!

The king wants his horse,

He wants it tonight

And, of course,

He can’t ride it far in ajar!

////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\

Abble dabble kibble cow

Come out now!

////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\

That didn’t work

Did it….

////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\

Ribbit! Tip Rabbit!

Jars are a bad habit!

Give up and get out!

////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\

Sigh……

////\\\\////\\\\////\\\\

Well I could try and fake it

And just up and break it!

But how do I

Resize the horse that is in it

When I’m on a deadline

That ends in ONE MINUTE!

Wacky Wordage No. 11- “Mes Feline” – Tricia Waterbury & J.R. Poulter

Bowler-Hatted-Cat by Tricia Waterbury

Bowler-Hatted-Cat by Tricia Waterbury

Cat Character No. 1: “Mes Feline” by J.R.Poulter

I have a cat in a bowler hat

Who struts his stuff in style!

He went to dine at Le Chez Feline

And ordered jalapos and wine.

>o >o > o >o

The wine was fine but the chilli was hot,

Hot as pepper from the pot!

The cat spat the chilli back into the vat,

Threw up in his bowler hat,

Was booted out onto the welcome mat.

>o >o > o >o

A sorry cat with a ruined hat,

He sadly sat under the neon sign

Drank the rest of the bottle of wine

And that was that for mes feline!

Weirdly wacky wordage no. 10 – Laddy McLaird – images by Stephen King

Scottish Lad by Stephen King

Scottish Lad by Stephen King

Laddy McLaird, a grim, ghastly tale wi’ a beard!

by J.R.Poulter 08

Fair Laddy McLaird was the baddest o bairns

Ever born in the Valley o Bones

A wild wicked child with the tricks and the wiles

Of many a blackguard full grown!

xxxx######xxxx######

Though the Elders it seems were aware of his schemes,

They turned a blind eye till he bit Piper Skye

But what’s worst, Piper fell on his pipes,

The bag burst and by cripes

The Piping the Haggis was wrecked!

That was the last straw they declared Lad outlawed

Twas high time the boy learned respect!

xxxx######xxxx######

McKenna, McKanna, Auld Willy McGraw

The McCougalls, McDougalls and Curly McHaugh

Chased Laddy from town with staves and with staffs

And accompanied his exit with full bellied laughs!

xxxx######xxxx######

Now they’d chased Laddy down, right out of the town

Far, far from his home in the Valley o Bones.

Till they came to the loch, “G’won scram,!”

Lad could nay swim but had na mind to drown!”

Lad was a fast learner, with nary a murmur

He leapt in the loch and he swam!

xxxx######xxxx######

When he came to the shore

It was night cold and raw and off in the distance he saw

A light – twas a fire and as he drew nigher

He found a giant maggot frying fish over faggots

“Gimme some or I squish yer!!” he cried!

xxxx######xxxx######

The maggot was clever but terribly slow and so

So he moved like a lardy great blob.

Lad snatched up the fish and finished the dish

By emptying the lot down his gob!

“Oi Thar!” cried the Maggot emitting a sob,

It’s cold and I’m awfully famished”!

xxxx######xxxx######

“No worries!” sneered Lad, “you’re meal was na bad.

So yer won’t have to beg and be sorry!

Just get off yer flub, yer fat useless grub

And I won’t turn you into a curry!”

xxxx######xxxx######

Lad spent a quiet night by the faggot’s firelight

And cooked up the maggot for supper

There was plenty to eat and meat was quite sweet

For the maggot had plenty of blubber.

xxxx######xxxx######

The next morning Lad woke as the sun up and broke

Like an egg on the mountains above him.

He filled up a flagon and I’m never braggin’

His thirst was the size of Loch Ness!

Then he loaded what’s left of the maggot and faggots

Upon the poor larvae’s own wagon.

xxxx######xxxx######

About midday, about midway

Across the plain under the mountain

Lad thought he saw something that could be a bird

But as it came closer, proved much more absurd.

He shook his head in disbelief

And took a long pull on his flagon,

‘Twas never a bird the likes HE’d ever heard

But rather more like, well, a dragon!

xxxx######xxxx######

It soared down towards him. Our Lad got prepared.

But the closer it got, he could see what ‘twas not

And the weirder ‘n wilder ‘n worse it appeared!

There was one thing this dragon had lots!

xxxx######xxxx######

“Why it has na meat on it!

It’s naught but bare bones!

What harm can a thing do

That’s spare as the stones?”

xxxx######xxxx######

Lad stood his ground as the dragon flew down

But the closer it drew, this foul stench kinda grew.

The dragon breathed naught but foul air!

“What kind of a beast am I goin’ to defeat?

I want to be feared for the warfare I wage

For my cunning and cruelty and terrible rage!

This joke of a monster’s not fair!”

xxxx######xxxx######

The dragon swooped on him, he thought he’d be sick

The odour was awful, it made the air thick!

It flung wide it jaws. Lad saw down its throat.

There was nothing but spareribs that’s worthy of note.

So he skewered the creature head down on a tree

Then proceeded to cook up the spareribs for tea!

xxxx######xxxx######

With all this strange food, young McLaird grew a beard

And figured he’d figure’s a figure much feared.

So he claimed dragon castle and won it’s fair maid

And headed for home with the loot he had made.

xxxx######xxxx######

Now the folk in the Valley had thought Lad was dead

Or at least that was what all the elders had said.

So when this strange stranger came thundering down

From the high mountain passes into their wee town

They voted him TOPS as the ugliest Scot

Ere to down a wee drop and made him the Laird o the Crofts.

Lad became legend! Just one wee thing peeved,

Not one of his tales of his feats were believed….

Dragon Bones by Stephen King

Dragon Bones by Stephen King

Wacky Wordage Number 7 – “Pandamonium” – inspired by Joy ‘Stewy’ Steuerwald

Joy Steuerwald's Panda

Joy Steuerwald

Pandamonium! By J.R.Poulter

Panda’s contemplating

Where his belly button’s at

He thinks it’s moved, but it might be

That Panda’s getting fat!

He’s also found his toes are all

Slipping fast from view

Underneath an overhang

That’s made of Panda too.

He’s got a taste for honey

When he should be eating greens!

Didn’t listen to his Mummy

Hid his bamboo shoots and beans!

He has to exercise he’s told

Or he will get so big,

He’ll be just like a roley ball

And look more like a PIG!

Come on Panda, Panda do

Have a waggle, waggle, wiggle,

Wag your tum and bottom too!

Waggle, wiggle, wiggle, jiggle,

What a giggle!

You join too!

Come ‘n join him, join in wiggling!

It’s more fun when there are two

To wiggle jiggle giggling,

Even MORE when there’s a few!

Panda’s dancing! Panda’s dancing!

Do you fancy dancing too?

Come’n join him! Come’n join him

There’s room for ALL of you!

Oh dear, the floor is sagging

From the stompy bompy feet

The foundations are all caving in

SCRASH! We’re in a heap!

Oh that was fun!

Let’s go some more,

But better do our dance

OUTDOORS!

….____….____

I fell in love with this introspective little Panda and thought I’d bring him out of his shell – Joy thought that was a good idea too! This was the result!

Joy’s website is http://joystewy.com/illustrations.cfm

This poem and illustration feature in a book we are preparing for Sharing Books [www.sharing-books.com]

Wacky Wordage No. 5 – Self Portrait of Mattias Adolfsson

Solf Portrait of Mattias Adolfsson

Self Portrait of Mattias Adolfsson

REFLECTION UPON THE SELF PORTRAIT OF MATTIAS ADOLFSSON, by J.R.Poulter

Nice shade of Blue!

Do you do other Hues too?

A puce or vermillion

Could look like a Million.

Heliotrope’s a nice shade

But a bit prone to fade….

+++—+++—

Just tan is so boring,

Common White isn’t scoring

Can you really bare to be inked

In pink!

And then there’s yellow

Well that ‘s a tad mellow…

Black’s back,

At least on the fashion track.

+++—+++—

I do think blue

Looks good on you!

Would you colour me too?

+++—+++—

[This is brave stuff – he has also done a selfportrait as a merman, or is it being half eaten by a sharkodile? I might have to do a wacky wordage on that one too…]